I jinxed every moment spent
trying to be okay with myself when I left.
Your car idling sounded like crickets
from a distance.
The night before you tried to kill yourself
I had a dream that you did.
And the next morning ODing on pills and alcohol
you called, slurring bad.
I realized we must all wanna die most all the time.
And racing to the hospital
was the only moment I ever knew
I couldn't swerve off the road just yet.
Not until I had seen you in that hospital bed.
I wanted to trade places with you.
And your car idling sounded like
crickets from a distance.
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